My mum's remote control

My mum all the way from China has managed to set me up with a guy in seattle US. She is a superwoman.
So, I am meeting him the first time and his one big family tomorrow from the US in Vancouver.

I hope I won't end up swallowing too much food due to extreme boredom and embarrassment.

He sent me a few emails in the past few days. They all have no more than 10 words.
Like: do you snowboard? See you

or " have you ever been to Seattle? have a good night"

I will replied: " yes. good night" or " I do, see you"

It is gonna to be so much fun...

I had an one night stand

I didn't tell anyone about this. His name is a secret.
Just want to talk about this painful event here in this diary -no- one- reads.

I had my first one night stand a few months ago. It broke my heart and it was one of the worst thing I had ever done to myself. I really like if not love him because I believe he is a very nice person and he felt the same for me. But it turn out I am totally nobody in his life and he just have sex with me because it was convenient.

I felt like a piece of trash. I called him names the other day and he was not very happy about it.

I can still feel the pain. Is that because I love him or just my self-esteem is complaining?

He is probably not someone I will get alone with once I really get to know him and might not even worth my time to think of. Maybe it is better to end this way or even better end with a double slap on his face.

I probably really just like a prostitute to him. ( he did offer me 2000 dollar from all those money he won that night)

Will my love life in 2008 get any better?